remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
