in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
