Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize