"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
