I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
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