If i come over, it means nothing
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
