STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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