I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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