You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
