the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
