ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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