ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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