yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Randomize
