Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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