That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm bleeding and have questions
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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