She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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