so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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