Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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