I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
tequila makes me forget i have legs
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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