guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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