O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
