You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
