Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
