Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
