i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
