so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize