is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize