no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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