i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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