went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
