idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
