lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I wear drunk well.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
