He is an equal opportunity slut.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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