WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize
