is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
He has the fingertips of a God
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