Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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