i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
So vagazzling was a success
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