Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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