do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
