how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
