How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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