DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
