Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
The beer is more important than you right now.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
