Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
