She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
