He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize