But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
