He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
