Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
