remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
