THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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